I have no intentions on making this blog a feminist man bashing, specifically black man bashing, type of situation. However as a woman that dates black men some of my experiences will reflect the not so great side of the realities many of us face…so with that being said LET THE MAN BASHING BEGIN!!! LMAO
Alright, I’ll start off by being honest and transparent about myself… I am a sucker for Love. I Loveeeeee LOVE and most times if I like a guy I’ve planned my whole life with him after the first month of dating. HUGE PROBLEM! How well could I know this guy after a month to plan a life with him. I’ve realized that I would have planned that life with anyone which led me to my next issue, I’m tooooo damn flexible. Oh your a janitor, cool! Great, you drop fries at Coney island…interesting! Cartel, that’s deep, tell me more! Naw bruh none of these careers or occupations are conducive for my life so I shouldn’t put myself in a situation to find out the hard way why. But I do because I’m a helpless romantic and I dream of finding my Cinderellonte’ and living happily ever after. Most of all I am humble, I understand that I am one bad day, decision, or circumstance away from being in a less fortunate or desperate situation myself so I try to be understanding. Now understanding is different from delusional, I’ve been both. lol. The delusions led me to see the potential in guys instead of the reality of who they are today, tomorrow ain’t promised. Three lessons (1) Don’t plan for a life with a stranger (2) Be honest with yourself about what you want and what will work for you (3) Potential don’t pay no bills or raise no kids
You deserve what you want, its time out for everything else, there is no biological clock, nor is it a bad thing to be happy, life isn’t going to be easy but don’t make it harder for yourself. You deserve to live the life u want so try to get there.The universe has already created your obstacles, no need to add to it!
Alright enough about me lets talk about these guys, THEY AINT SHIT! Thee end… No really I’m starting to feel that way. I never wanted to be that girl and I have been patiently waiting for the men that cross my path to be decent, stand up guys. Guys that are polite, successful, hardworking, drama-less, emotionally stable, tall and handsome. Ok, the last two are a stretch but its definitely what I want on the low. Where are they, I’ve only seen them in pictures and movies…sort of like dinosaurs, like did them shits ever really exists? Any day now Michael B. Jordan gon slide in my DMs and confess his love to me and he’s going to be perfect, just like he is in Creed.
I have what I like to call my starting 5… 5 guys I’m dating and or communicating with at any given time. I can efficiently manage 5 guys without messing up names or sending them the wrong texts so I stick to that. I feel like I need to date multiple guys at a time for many reasons mainly because they collectively make one guy lol. I typically have one that likes to talk, one that likes to text, one that likes to eat, one that is also dating multiple ppl and one that gets on my nerve but he’s always available. Its a shame right, I know, but its my reality and the reality of most of my friends…sounds like we ain’t shit either huh?
Moral of the story is… dating is just as interesting and mysterious as Dinosaurs! I manage a Z-League franchise of all-stars! and Micheal B Jordan is BAE…somebody tag him!
-J
P.S I’m totally aware that “ain’t” isn’t a word…don’t come for me! (I recently found out that “aint” is a word LOL .. .http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/ain’t )
Queenin 
I’m still waiting on my Cinderellonte’!! Def eye opening to know that I “wasn’t” alone accepting people for who they were instead of accepting what I wanted in someone. And it typically ended with their shortcomings “turning me off” (Keri Hilson voice). Dating is hard when you love hard. How do you maintain your starting 5? I keep starting with 5 and falling for 2 and being confused my damn self.
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I manage them based on their personalities, but ultimately I make sure I put my needs first. Whatever I need or want from them I get lol I know it sounds bad but it’s the truth. Eventually some will fall off and you let them go. The benefit is ur able to get all the attention you want or desire from any of these guys if not all of them the magic in it is that your not always available. So it allows the guys to chase u, women like us (honestly all women) lol make ourselves toooo available and we overwhelm guys with all of this love we have to offer and they might not want it or might not be able to handle it all at one time. So rotating the love prevents that and gives you time to decide what you want from them or for them to reveal somethings to you. So the short answer is… I keep my eyes on the prize and I understand that the prize may or may not be one of them
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